The Impact of Betrayal Trauma: Recognizing Symptoms and Seeking Help with a Decatur Therapist

Betrayal trauma? Yes, it’s a thing. But what exactly is it?

Betrayal trauma happens when trust is broken with someone that you depend on and feel safe with (romantic partner, parent, institution, or friend), it is devastating AND traumatic.

Here, in Decatur, many have found solace through professional therapy after experiencing the profound emotional aftershock of such betrayal.

After a betrayal you may find it difficult to function in the simplest of ways:

• Your daily routine seems impossible.

• You cannot concentrate.

• Your appetite has either vanished or you cannot stop eating.

• You cannot sleep or you cannot get out of bed.

• Your emotions may feel like they are on the frontmost seat of a roller coaster where you are hanging on for dear life, never knowing when the next drop or death roll will occur, and unsure of when it might end.

• Maybe you wish you could feel something but you are numb.

• You feel nothing.

• You may feel a confusing sense of shame for something you are not responsible for.

• You might be surprised by acting outside of your normal character by being easily triggered, aggressive, or withdrawing. It is possible that you have become an amateur detective – someone you were convinced you would never be.

• You are on high alert for danger and desperately searching for safety.

Did you know that betrayal can evoke symptoms similar to post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)? Here are the five chief PTSD symptoms:

1. Encountering a life-threatening event.

2. Reliving the traumatic incident.

3. Adopting avoidance tendencies.

4. Experiencing negative thoughts and moods.

5. Undergoing intensified emotional arousal.

Although after experiencing betrayal you may not consider your life to be threatened, you may no longer feel safe. Someone you thought you knew has shattered your trust and it may feel impossible to predict what will happen next. In the case of sexual betrayal, the possibility of a sexually transmitted infection can be a devastating reality with significant consequences.

Re-experiencing the event shows up in a betrayed person as nightmares, flashbacks, and unwanted images that seemingly pop up unannounced and unwelcome. Maybe you are trying to make sense of it all and keep replaying the pain in an effort to feel better. As if understanding would lessen the confusion and heartache.

Avoidance is prevalent following betrayal. Thinking about the betrayal can be overwhelming. So, you distract yourself by zoning out in front of the television, eating more than you normally would, or engaging in harmful use of drugs or alcohol. Maybe you do not want to leave the house for fear of being triggered and thereby stop seeing friends or engaging in activities that you normally enjoy. If you have been betrayed sexually, intimacy is understandably avoided as it can be a major pain trigger.

Betrayal can produce negative thoughts and moods. A common response to betrayal is the development of a negative view of self. You may begin to believe that you are not good enough or that somehow you caused the betrayal. These thoughts often lead to anxiety and/or depression in the betrayed person. Negative thoughts have a dramatic impact on mood and may be another way to try to make sense of the betrayal.

Emotional arousal is just another way to say intensified emotions or heightened responses. These responses usually begin outside of your awareness in your nervous system as fight, flight, freeze, or fawn reactions. This is how your body takes care of you when you are threatened. When you were betrayed, your safety was threatened. You may seek safety by being ready to fight. Maybe your instinct is to run away. You may become still to protect yourself. Or maybe in an effort to lessen your pain, you put your betrayer’s needs before your own. None of these responses are better or worse. They are your body’s natural protective mechanisms when sensing threats.

There are many responses to betrayal. Some responses may seem out of control or outside of what may be the norm for you. Recognizing some of these common reactions can bring comfort in knowing that you're not alone.

Many in Decatur have walked this challenging path and, with the help of a skilled therapist, have found their way back to stability and peace.

There is hope.

If you're grappling with betrayal trauma, consider seeking out a Decatur therapist. A professional can help you make sense of what you are feeling, aid in processing your pain, regain your sense of self, and provide hope for the future.

Need more help? Embarking on a therapeutic journey can be transformative, offering insights, growth, and healing. We at Aspen Grove Counseling and Wellness are here to support you every step of the way. If you have more questions or are ready to take the next step, please reach out. Your journey, your pace. We're here for you.

Click here to schedule your free 15-minute free phone consultation with one of our Decatur therapists.

Or give us a call at 770-954-5476, we’d be happy to hear what is happening and direct you to the right person to help.

At Aspen Grove Counseling and Wellness in Decatur some of our specialties include: anxiety therapy, grief and loss, depression therapy, couples therapy, substance abuse and addictions, counseling for college and graduate students, and pregnancy/postpartum therapy.