Marriage Counseling in Decatur: Part Four - Trust and Commitment
After a bit of a blogging hiatus, we are back with the final post in our marriage counseling series. Better late than never!
In this blog series, I have enjoyed sharing some of the most common issues that I see as a couples therapist. In the previous posts I have talked about how it is important to make time for connection, tips on how to manage conflict in your relationship, and how to strengthen your friendship with your partner. If you haven’t had a chance to read them, go back and check them out.
In this fourth and final post in our marriage counseling series, I want to talk about trust and commitment and how they are the walls holding up your relationship.
What is trust?
I often hear that trust in a relationship is the absence of betrayal or infidelity. Yes, that is true. But trust is so much more. Trust is knowing that your partner will be there for you when you have a bad day. Trust is not gossiping or talking badly about your partner to others. Trust is counting on your partner to do what they say they will do. Trust is knowing your partner will stick around when things get hard. Trust is knowing you’re not alone.
Trust helps us to feel safe in our relationships.
We build trust in every day interactions. We do this by attuning to our partner - or being aware of their feelings and turning towards them with curiosity and interest. We build trust by showing up in our relationship - by admitting when we are wrong and saying sorry and doing the things we say we will do.
Commitment and trust go hand in hand.
Commitment is the actions you take to choose your relationship every day. It is making decisions with the relationship in mind that benefit the “we” versus just the “me.” When you disagree, it is still turning towards your partner to try to understand where they are coming from.